i brazenly showed off my legs for this

"but wutsu i thougt you dun play mobil rhythm gaim anymoer"

Firstly, that's false. I still play some of them. Secondly, that doesn't mean that I'm no longer entitled to make fun of them. ;P

Half-inspired by Pipefan's Cytus Artists blog, today I'mma show you how to become an expert charter in all of your favourite mobile rhythm games. By following these simple steps, I guarantee you'll be able to make charts exactly like Rayark, Bit192, KLab, C4Cat, or whoever the f*ck is making your game.

oh and before you get triggered or smth this is just satire calm the f*ck down lol

Now without further ado, let's get rolling.

  • The difficulty of your song comes before everything else, including playability and entertainment value
  • Make your drag notes as nonsensical as possible to make your chart look impressive
  • If you can't think of a creative pattern, use eight-note groups and triple notes, your fanbase will gladly mistake it as artistry
    • The Jaggedness Rule: The harder your song, the more spread apart and crooked your eight-note groups have to be
  • Hold notes are easy, so only use them to make your other better note types harder to hit
  • Overlaps and off-sync notes don't matter if your chart follows the previous rules cuz it's epic and wAO THOSE DRAG NOTES FORM L AND A NUMBER
  • Also, your audience only has to enjoy 80% of your charts lmao

  • Hold notes were pathetic in Cytus, so you don't have to worry about that trash here
  • Your chart should 'technically' be feasible with just thumbs/index fingers, but try to make your charts so that only the fastest clapper in the world could actually follow that rule and do well
  • Still feel free to use grouped notes as a crutch, a lot less people will notice in this game
  • Implement slide notes in patterns that could easily have them be treated as tap notes
  • Otherwise, spam the everliving f*ck out of them to, again, make your chart look impressive
  • You may have to actually put some work in these charts, as you have to give your audience the impression that you actually care about this game

  • You should revel in making your chart as confusing and nauseating as possible
  • If the player is forced to look at the Autoplay for your chart in order to understand it, you've done a good job
  • Your chart should not be possible with thumbs; in fact, you should be attempting to get the player to use all their fingers
  • In relation to the previous goal, your chart is flawed if it does not have a triple or quadruple note somewhere in it
    • The Difficulty Rule: The difficulty of your song is directly proportional to the number of triple/ quadruple notes in your song
  • Not only can you use slide notes in place of tap notes like in Deemo, but this will come with the bonus of punishing the player for treating them like tap notes

  • You don't have to worry too much about difficulty, as the mere design of your game makes it impossible
  • Instead, just do whatever the f*ck you like and nobody will bat an eye
  • Like with Tone Sphere, you should be trying to get the player to use all of their fingers, as well as implement as many triple+ notes as possible
  • If your chart gets the player to slam their fingers together by accident, you've done a good job
  • The slide mechanic on one or two of the sides of the chart should only serve to give the player a false sense of security before the remaining side(s) ruin their lives

  • lol people still actually play this game?

  • All rules for Deemo apply, except make it more circular and artistic
  • Being Leonardo da Vinci might help you

  • All rules for Deemo apply, except make your hardest charts still feasible for a toddler to clear

  • Hold notes are actually difficult in this game, and you need to take every opportunity to make them as obnoxious as possible
  • Click notes should only come second to hold notes; you're doing it wrong if you think otherwise
  • Use star notes wherever you want, nobody will notice since they're too focused on not botching the impossible timing
  • If a song repeats itself, use the same pattern but reflected in the vertical axis; it works every time
  • Try not to make your charts too difficult or else you'll drive away the people that are only there for the waifus

  • Just make your entire level based off of the spaceship mechanic, it's the only type of gameplay that requires any type of skill beyond memorization

  • Hire a 13 year old to chart for you; they'll be able to do as good of a job as you could
  • Also take a little while to reevaluate your taste in games and your life choices

  • i know nothing about these games sorry

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